The way my memory works is a very peculiar thing. I can remember voices and faces even after only hearing or seeing them once. I can remember what people were wearing the very first time I met them, the latest dating back to ten years ago. I can remember AND lecture you on the thorough history of vibrators and various other sex toys (I learned it in Anthropology of Sex, okay). Yet, I couldn't remember anything from the 9 years of my childhood, or that one math equation to save my life. I always seem to forget my parents' ages even after asking them yearly. I wish I could sort through the piles of recollections which my memory automatically decides to hold on to. Discard what is unnecessary and make room to store more. For example, I really don't need to remember what I had for lunch three months ago, but I really need to remember to make an appointment for advisement (which has been delayed for far too long). I'd rather my mind attach itself on things far more important. Yesterday, I went to De La Salle with my father to pray the Stations of the Cross. The last time I was there was a week after I had gotten back from leading my first Kairos, approximately six months ago. At this time, she had been stopping by church weekly to meditate before commuting to school. And this one day, she asked for my company, telling me it "would mean a lot" to her. I agreed, and I changed out of my sweaty clothes into a crisp white t-shirt while I waited for her to pick me up. After praying, we sat down on a bench near the parish office outside. What she told me then, I still vividly remember, as if it happened yesterday... though I'm sure she's already forgotten all about it. I latched onto her arm, while we both cried silent tears of sweetness, excitement, joy, and reassurance about what our future would look like. It makes me laugh now about how incredibly wrong she was.
Two years ago today, I sang her a stupid, cheesy song I wrote on the guitar. I can't recall all the lyrics, but I can still play it. I messed up a little bit, and I think I sang too quietly. But still, she said "yes".
Happy April 22nd.
mkp.
